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The New Guard

University Workshop for ‘Femme, Trans, Womyn-Identifying Folk’ Promises to Confront Bicycle Maintenance Challenges Posed by ‘Capitalist Patriarchy’

By

Nick Baker

February 5, 2024

The University of Oregon is hosting a bicycle maintenance course for “femme, trans, and womyn-identifying [sic] folk,” according to a tip received through Young America’s Foundation’s Campus Bias Tip Line.

An event listing on the university’s official calendar asks students to reflect: “Have the material and psychic conditions of capitalist patriarchy prevented you from being the confident, nerdy bicycle mechanic you would love to be?”

It appears that there are not many students saying yes to that prompt, as only one person has expressed interest as of this writing.

The workshop, sponsored by the university’s Division of Student Life and Outdoor Program, will teach students who identify with the select leftist identity groups “topics including fixing flats, wheel hub overhauls, wheel truing, brake adjustments, drivetrains, and derailleurs.”

Given how much this university evidently despises capitalism, you may be surprised to learn that this workshop has a registration fee of $65.

Putting aside the fact that “femme, trans, and womyn-identifying” are all made-up identities, the university’s suggestion that the free market and men are preventing these confused students from learning how to patch a flat tire are, of course, ridiculous.

A man invented the bicycle, and without the free market, these students certainly wouldn’t be riding around campus on bikes as nice as the ones they own.

Also thanks to the free market, University of Oregon students, regardless of race, sex, religion, or made-up leftist gender identity, have plenty of options to choose from when it comes to their bicycle maintenance needs and just about everything else. The only thing holding them back is their own desire to claim victimhood.

When asked by the New Guard to explain its reasoning for offering this workshop, the Outdoor Program said, “it’s basically just for people who have been, like, underrepresented in outdoor spaces, and they might not have got the opportunity to be outdoors. The capitalist patriarchy has caused outdoor programming to be discriminatory against those who are not white men — so it’s a space for those people to tell each other how to work on their bikes.”

 


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